I’m not a narcissist. At all.

Wasn’t raised to be.

Honestly, I had low confidence in myself until I found Improv Comedy at 19.

It gave me some good social confidence. Made me a great active listener. And was the beginnin’ of my persuasion trainin’.

Now, even though, I was way more socially confident – I was still pretty self deprecating – talked bad bout myself.

All the time too.

I always, always, always threw myself under the bus for a dumb joke.

It made me feel worse.

I would call myself nasty, useless, and whole bunch of negative crap. All so I can make other people laugh.

To be frank, self deprecation sucks.

And it’s a easy way to have girls not like you too. They hate that.

So, if you always throw yourself under the bus, your makin’ people give you compliments to pump up your own confidence…

… Hey, let me give you a nice lil’ secret – humans are lazy, selfish – they don’t care bout your problems. They care bout their own problems.

Who cares if your mom was in car accident?

They don’t.

Who cares if your girlfriend left you?

They don’t.

Lookin’ for an apartment?

Betta talk to someone else buddy – cause most people don’t care, whatsoever.

So, to me, a better strategy to persuade people – that is to get people to buy from you, date you or hire you – is to showcase super self love.

What’s that?

Well you gotta say nice things to yourself. And bout yourself. Constantly.

And – I mean – constantly.

Daily, monthly, yearly.

This mindset takes work too.

You can use mantras for this.

My mantra is I’m the best! I’m the champion’s chariot!

Mantras help a lot.

Positivity Is Rare – Use It!

Like I say before, I work in a bar for tips every weekend – sellin’ mints and gum and other stuff.

The two best sellin’ tools I have are my positive personality and looks. That’s it.

Even on job interviews, I make sure I look clean. And I don’t throw my self under the bus.

I only talk ’bout my accomplishments, strengths, and good experiences.

Only, only, only.

Why?

Cause sellin’ positivity makes you look different, since  everybody is talkin’ bout their negative life crap…

Annoyin’ girlfriend. Or wife.

Annoyin’ bills. Not enough moolah.

Annoyin’ health issues.

And other stuff.

Then, you come in smilin’ and calm. You’re a breath of fresh air in a sea of negativity.

You’re different. This is how you stand out.

Positivity is rare, rare, rare.

 

LOOKS FREAKIN’ MATTER

If anyone ever tells you that looks don’t matter – they are stupid. Really stupid.

People judge you on your looks (even when they say they’re not – they are)

All great marketers know this, pick up guys know this, and budding persuaders (me!) know this.

Looks matter. 

Looks matter.

Looks matter!

Read Robert Cialdini’s book Influence. He has a good selection on this.

Turn on CNN (crappy, but persuasive) – all the female hosts look super attractive.

Even on commercials, the girls (and guys) look super good.

In superhero movies, everyone’s buff.

That’s cause the human brain is mostly influenced by visual images. Which is why people can sit in front of a screen for hours and hours and hours and hours at a time.

A good lookin’ person can hijack your brain.

Looks are persuasive.

So, what do you do?

Focus on your looks.

Go to the gym.

Eat clean. Drink kombucha. Carrot juice.

Wear clean, fashionable clothes.

Dental care, skin care, hair care – all important to persuade someone.

Take stock in your looks.

You might think this is stupid, but I promise you – it’s not.

Try it out once. And see how people treat you. It’s night an’ day. It really is…

… Persuasion is hard…

… But I’ve been in the service industry for a 10 plus years. And these are the two basic persuasion tools that has helped me make some cash.

I’ve even used this in dating.  And even makin’ friends.

These are two easy and very, very, very, underrated techniques.

Use ’em!

Mirrors Are Awesome!

Later,

— Jamual